angelgazing (
angelgazing) wrote2010-09-13 11:05 pm
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write all the cliches?
Things of note:
- I am currently trying to talk
musesfool into writing a story with ALL THE CLICHES IN THE WORLD.
- ... How many fanfic tropes could you fit into one story?
- Shut up. I am totally not tempted to try and write all the cliches.
- Though, lucky for me,
jibrailis wrote The Big Sleep, which is a story where Arthur's vicious in his sleep, and Eames subdues him with petting. You guys, this is the story of my heart! Having to be stealthy to cuddle! Petting! Hating on the creeptasticness that is Edward!
- \o/
- Also, the awesome thing about fandom: someone else will write it so you don't have to! :DDD
- Okay, so I might be considering attempting the write all the cliches.
- /o\
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2. ALL OF THEM!
3. You are a liar.
4. I thought of you when I read that one!
5. \o/ woo!
6. But two is better than one!
7. I told you you were a liar!
8. ...you mispelled "awesome" again.
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BUT WHICH CLICHES COULD I USE? ACCIDENTALLY MARRIED BODY SWAPPING THAT STARTS BECAUSE THERE IS ONLY ONE ROOM AT THE INN? PRETENDING BE BOYFRIENDS TO SETTLE A BET AFTER THEY GET LOCKED IN A CLOSET ONLY TO FALL IN LOVE?
How can I not think of any more cliches?
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I still get distracted by how much I want to play with his hair in your icon
EAMES IS TOTALLY THE BOSS PERSON AT THE NEW PLACE WHERE ARTHUR WORKS. ARTHUR WAS HIGHLY SOUGHT AFTER AND ACCEPTED THE POSITION BECAUSE HE'D HEARD GREAT THINGS ABOUT EAMES. BUT HE'S GETTING COFFEE ACROSS THE STREET ON HIS FIRST DAY, AND RUNS INTO THIS GUY WHO IS DRESSED IN AN ILL-FITTING SUIT THAT TOTALLY PAIRS BLACK AND NAVY BLUE AND ARTHUR DIES A LITTLE MORE INSIDE EVERY TIME HE SEES A TRAGEDY LIKE THAT. AND THE GUY IS ALL SWARMY AND FLIRTY AND CALLING HIM PET NAMES AND BEING REALLY AMUSED AND SORT OF A JACKASS ABOUT HOW MUCH ARTHUR CLEARLY DISAPPROVES OF HIS EVERYTHING. AND THEN ARTHUR GETS TO THE OFFICE AND REALIZES--JFC THAT IS EAMES? WHAT HAS HE GOTTEN INTO?
ngl, it's fast becoming my fave
You could also work in the clichè about MISUNDERSTANDING! Like, maybe Cobb comes to pick up Arthur from work because it's Philippa's Bday or something and Eames sees them and thinks that Arthur has a BOYFRIEND! AN OLD BOYFRIEND AT THAT! INSERT PINING AND NOT-REALLY-UNREQUITED LOVE! Maybe Eames sees Cobb being lovey with Mal at some point and is convinced that ARTHUR IS THE OTHER WOMAN AND COBB IS STRINGING HIM ALONG! INSERT POSSESSIVE/PROTECTIVE EAMES TO THE RESCUE! Except that Arthur doesn't know about this and Cobb doesn't tell him about the misunderstanding because he's just really embarassed. Eames is totally more chirpy afterwards, though.
that is a totally valid lifestyle choice!
Oh, OH! OR COBB TOTALLY DOESN'T TRUST EAMES! SO HE PRETENDS THAT, YES, HE IS TOTALLY HAVING THE SEX WITH ARTHUR, SO EAMES SHOULD STOP SEXUALLY HARASSING HIM. And Arthur is sort of all, "WTF, Cobb" and looking at him like he's a lunatic when Cobb shows up to meet him for lunch and puts a hand on the small of his back because Eames is watching, or wraps an arm around his shoulders. And Eames comes up all *stompstompfume* ARTHUR, BUSINESS LUNCH, LAST MINUTE, VERY IMPORTANT PARTNERS, COME WITH ME NOW. And Cobb is all *squintsquintglare* and Arthur is all, "Dom, I'm so sorry." And Cobb is all, "No, no, it's fine. Important opportunity." But still with the glaring at Eames. And Eames is BEAMING, because he totally won this round! So Cobb, like, "Mal and I totally expect you for dinner, this weekend," and like trails his hand down Arthur's spine. And Arthur narrows his eyes, and looks back and forth between Cobb's sudden smirk and Eames' face dropping into something almost threatening, and hates every single thing about his life, but mostly how very, very hot he finds Eames--HIS BOSS--when he looks at him like that.
Later, when he gets back from an expensive lunch on the company's dime that he was absolutely not needed or prepared for, he sends an email to allforgueudarling that consisted solely of a demotivational poster and the subject line, "my best friend is either trying to ruin my career or invite me into a threesome with his wife." He has no doubt that his penpal--obviously the only sane person in his life--will be able to better sort of which one Arthur would prefer. He's wrong, of course. Three minutes later, he gets an email in return that says only "hahahahahahahahahahaha." The subject line reads, "Thanks, I needed that."
:DDD
COBB THE LITTLE PARENT IN THE MAKING! HE WATCHES OUT FOR HIS PRACTICALLY YOUNGER BROTHER! Arthur is confused! Eames is not amused! But Allforgeudarling is having a field day! You know what? You should include THE MEDDLING COWORKER CLICHÈ! Ariadne spies Arthur reading his email and smiling his dimpled smile at an Allforgeudarling's email and now she's convinced that's Arthur's real boyfriend! She gossips about it in the coffee room to Yusuf and Eames eavesdrops the conversation and now he really wants to know who it is that makes Arthur smile like that but can't be bothered to stop old married men from getting their hands all over Arthur. He wants to know this person's name so he can go and punch them in the face for not knowing what they have!
like You've Got Mail, but better, because there's no Meg Ryan!
MEANWHILE
back at the ranchARTHUR FIGURES OUT ALLFORGUEUDARLING'S TRUE IDENTITY WHEN SOMETHING HAPPENS AND EAMES DOES SOMETHING THAT ALLFORGEYOUDARLING WAS TALKING ABOUT. OR. I DON'T KNOW. THEY ARE SUPPOSED TO MEET AND ARTHUR SEES HIM AND FREAKS OUT. AND ANYWAY ARTHUR IS FREAKING OUT BECAUSE HE HAS BEEN COMPLAINING ABOUT HIS BOSS TO HIS BOSS AND ALSO IT TURNS OUT HE SORT OF HATES THE MAN HE IS MADLY IN LOVE WITH WHAT KIND OF SHIT IS THAT? AND EAMES/ALLFORGEUDARLING IS ALL DISTRAUGHT LOOKING, BUT ARTHUR HAS NO IDEA WHAT TO SAY TO HIM, OR HOW TO 'FESS UP TO THE WHOLE MESS. SO HE JUST SPENDS A LOT OF TIME AROUND EAMES TRYING NOT TO BLUSH AND/OR LOOKING LIKE HE IS DOING AN EXCELLENT IMPRESSION OF A VERY IMPECCABLY DRESSED FISH.MEANWHILE, ARIADNE AND YUSUF'S SNEAKING AROUND HAS UNCOVERED WHO THE EMAIL BELONGS TO. THEY DON'T MEAN TO GOSSIP, HONESTLY, ESPECIALLY WITH THE SAITO DEAL COMING UP. BUT FISCHER, WHO WANTS TO PUT A WRENCH IN THE SAITO TAKE OVER PLANS OVERHEARS...
ARTHUR AND EAMES WALK IN TO THE OFFICE AT THE SAME TIME THE NEXT DAY, BICKERING OVER THEIR COFFEE. AND MAYBE ARTHUR IS SMILING JUST A LITTLE BIT BECAUSE HE AND EAMES HAVE GROWN CLOSER. AND EVERYONE STOPS TO STARE, BECAUSE NOW EVERYONE THINKS ARTHUR ONLY GOT THE JOB BECAUSE HE WAS SLEEPING WITH EAMES, AND ALL THEIR FIGHTS WERE JUST LOVERS QUARRELS AND THIS IS HOW EAMES FINDS OUT THAT ARTHUR IS...
I can't think of a good e-mail address for Arthur. D:
I hated her guts in that movie!
AN EXCELLENT IMPRESSION OF A VERY IMPECCABLY DRESSED FISH I declare this the Caption of the Year!
OMG! This is, like, a bajillion times better than the movie! I'll never be able to watch it again without zoning out and WATCH THIS VERSION IN MY BRAIN!
Arthur's anything is hard to figure out >:( Idk, something to do with "point"? I'm not good with (English) puns, though :(
the thing I remember most is being annoyed at Tom Hanks backspacing one character at a time
LOL I may need to watch it again just so I can figure out how Arthur finds out Eames' TRUE IDENTITY. Oh, oh, imagine how hurt Eames would be when he finds out and more--finds out Arthur knew.
I ALWAYS fail at puns. It's terribly tragic. Um. um. UM. Maybe Arthur's is just stupidly serious? a.pointman81@gmail.com? atthepoint@yahoo.com? WHY SO DIFFICULT, ARTHUR? WHY IS IT ALWAYS ARTHUR?
One day, I'm going to write something from Eames' POV. Then he'll be sorry!
(Probably this thing will be the nanny prompt from the kink meme, since OMG NO ONE TALKED ME OUT OF IT, WHY? Maybe I could change it! Maybe Eames could be the nanny that Mal and Dom hire, and he and Arthur clash a lot because naturally Arthur is over there ALL THE TIME while they're working and... Arthur doesn't trust him! With good reason because it turns out Eames is just there to get his hands on dreamshare information, but of course before he can Mal jumps and Dom has to go on the run and Arthur and Eames totally take care of the kids together or something. IDK! I worry about writing two different stories were Eames has a kid (or more than one, IDK) and I really, really liked the idea of the first one, but I'm not sure how to combine them at all.)
Ugh. My life is so hard.
I always yell "SELECT ALL/DELETE DAMN YOU!" at the tv when that scene comes up
Eames would be heartbroken, but what was Arthur supposed to do? He loves Allforgeudarling and Eames made him crazy and it was such a mess! He's not good with relationships!
Arthur would have a serious email address! I was thinking yesterday something like afinepoint@gmail.com, but I like yours best :)
I'd love to see your take on Eames :D
(both of those are fantastic ideas! I'm not gonna lie, the first one has my heart, but mostly because I love the idea of Eames-the-single-parent and Arthur-the-stern-teacher-with-a-secret-marshmallow-core. But I'd love to read the other one too! I don't know, I can only assure you that I'll be here cheering for you forever! :D?)
or SHIFT UP. Hold down the key! THERE ARE BETTER WAYS, DAMMIT. Drives me nuts.
I am SO SCARED to try and write Eames now! I don't know. I've gotten so used to Arthur hating the world. LOL
♥♥♥ the first one totally has my heart, too. I like the idea of Eames being sort of helpless at raising a little girl, but in a way that also makes him the best dad ever, and his little girl being the most no-nonsense ever, and she totally knows what's up even before Arthur does, and often wonders why adults have to be so dumb about things. BUT, at the same time, I like the idea of Eames being completely hopeless at raising very little children, and being forced to get a nanny to control them. He hires Arthur mostly because Arthur looks like he's fresh out of military school himself, and is stern enough to restore some order. And Eames is pretty horrified to discover how indulgent Arthur is with the kids, later, because Arthur is NEVER indulgent with him!
WHY SO HARD TO CHOOSE?
Also, the caviar thing. YOU ARE ALLOWED TO EAT IT! IT'S FOOD! YOU EAT IT!
I deeply believe that your Eames would be delightful! :D
Argh. They are all of them so amazing! Arthur is a secret marshmallow! Kids are the way to his heart! Arthur can't be indulgent with Eames because Eames is his employer! It wouldn't be professional!
IMPOSSIBLE TO CHOOSE!
possibly I'm going to have to rewatch the movie so I can figure this thing out
Oh, oh, and when Eames is all depressed because afinepoint hasn't replied to his email, and he's very confused, and he eyes Arthur sideways, while he smokes and Arthur just sort of hangs around holding onto a cigarette and trying to pretend he isn't watching Eames out of the corner of his eye. And Eames laughs, and finally says, "Christ, I must be worse off than I thought, if you're not stepping in to join in the chorus of this truly awful day with your typical belittling and unimaginative insults." "I'm sorry," Arthur says, and finally takes a drag, "I'll try and do better." And Eames just nods, mouth cocked, but not like he's really amused, and is all, "See that you do. It's terribly disappointing."
I have revised my to-do list (http://angelgazing.livejournal.com/191782.html). The first one won. I can totally fit in the part where Eames thinks Arthur is probably stuffy and overly stern only to realize he's the softest softy ever and totally spoilers Eames' little girl. He, you know, likes that.
STUPID BRAIN IT WON'T PICK A THINK TO WORK ON.
I may rewatch it just to laugh and point at all the things your version will do better
The only reason I'm not clutching my heart and making distressed sounds is because I know that you'll fix it and they will be happy together forever ;__;
I love that to-do list like burning! Also, all the possible titles! They are so beautiful! <333333
the main thing being, of course, that mine would have Eames and Arthur, and the real one does not
They will totally get all better and live happily ever after! Um. Um. After the deal goes through, and Arthur is leaving for a different firm where people don't think he slept his way into the position! Or, no! Throughout the entire thing they are both just ~unhappy with the job that is being done in the dream research! So, the Fischer takeover happens, even with all the PR drama of Eames possibly sexually harassing employees, and Arthur maybe only getting the job because he was sleeping with the boss, and the fact that they aren't living up to all the things that it could be. So, at the end of the day, they're both probably going to be given their walking papers anyway, and even though they were totally getting better again, Eames is barely speaking to him, and Arthur is a very smart guy and he knows... well, he knows Eames. Eames steals the PASIV device when he leaves, and when he gets to the hotel Arthur is already there in jeans and a terrible tourist t-shirt. And Arthur is just like, "So, I've sort of been in love with you since you wrote me a dissertation on how Disney cartoons were actually much more damaging to a child's developing psyche than the Grimm versions of the same tales." The he pauses for a while, while Eames stands in the door and looks smug, before he says, "Of course, that was before I realized how pathetically easy it would be to find you." And Eames grins, and says, "You don't hide as well as you'd like to think either. Come now, darling, time for the real get away." And then they live a life of crime on the run and it is GLORIOUS. And, um, Saito totally wanted them to steal the one valuable part of the company after they sold it to Fischer. Because he's a badass like that. He's even responsible for their new passports.
I'm glad one of us likes my to-do list. lol I'm still very afraid of it, okay. Very afraid. Also, I'm afraid all my possible titles are too serious for the sunshine and candy I've apparently decided to make my new cup of tea. LOL But thank you. ::hugs::
Which awards it ten thousand bajillions points already!
HELLO! I ALREADY GAVE YOU MY HEART, I ONLY HAVE MY SOUL TO OFFER YOU THIS TIME!
I've sort of been in love with you since you wrote me a dissertation on how Disney cartoons were actually much more damaging to a child's developing psyche than the Grimm versions of the same tales I MAY OR MAY NOT HAVE WRITTEN A PAPER LIKE THIS WHEN I WAS IN MIDDLE SCHOOL! THERE WERE FOOTNOTES! OMG! I love you, okay? You'll have to accept this as a fact of life.
I don't care if the titles are serious! They are beautiful! They make for, uh, a poetic contrast with the sunshine-and-candy flavor of your stories. They, hmm, enhance their literary value. And stuff.
It is the simple things that make it worth waking in the morning
Ahahaha THAT IS AWESOME. I think it's funniest because it's true. Disney totally sets children up for unreal expectations from reality while also KILLING ALL THE MOTHERS. And, and, basically I would just love to read that paper, okay. And I want Arthur to be charmed by Eames writing one, ok, even though he continued to argue just to argue. &boys; :D
But it is still, still never ever going to be near as awesome or adorable as you aaarrrt, omg.
Re: It is the simple things that make it worth waking in the morning
I was a very nerdy 13 years-old /o\ BUT! Best idea ever! Now you are bound to write this fic just so you can use this idea :DDD
LIES! YOU ARE A LYING LIAR WHO SPEAKS UNTRUTHS!