angelgazing | all across the alien nation

Arg. Am avoiding packing like whoa. So.

Random Things That Annoy Me In Fic Which I Would Like To Outlaw, Given The Opportunity, And Make Punishable By Public Stoning:

1) Boys talking about their feelings. Yeah, seriously. Stop it. You know why? Because they don't do it. No, really, they don't. Maybe it's just a redneck American thing, that anyone with a penis is taught to not show emotion. I don't care, really. It just stands that they do not stand there and talk about how they feel. If you can make it work? You've got my respect.

2) Lover. This word when used seriously? No. It makes me think of Will Ferrel. "Lov-ah" And that's just squicky. No one wants to be thinking of Will Ferrel in the middle of a Harry/Draco fic. Furthermore: There's the POV issue to contend with, because let me tell you something, unless House is being, well, House and a snarktastic pain in the ass, he would never, ever, ever think of Wilson or Chase or who the hell ever, as lover. It pains me to read.

3) Random use of random names. I know it's hard sometimes, I know that it's boring to type the same name over and over and over again. I know what it is to have a flaring distaste for pronouns and proper nouns. I know that the English language has kind of fucked the slash writers a little bit. But stop with the random name game thing. Please, please, I beg of you stop this, and House fandom, I'm especially looking at you. House is House, sometimes, House is Greg, but rarely. I suspect around his parents or something, and okay, so I've refused to have anything to do with the Sela Ward episodes, but I like my version better anyway. Wilson is always Wilson, except when he's being twelve and having a baseball star sign an autograph to Jimmy, and maybe to his wife, or normal people, he is James. Either way, nothing hurts me more than reading a paragraph with House and Wilson and House and James and Wilson and Greg. Pick one and stick with it. Nicknames hurt me, and I can't think of House as Greg for anything, but I'll take it, if you'll just stop using it randomly, because the other way just makes it sound like there are four people there instead of two.

4. Boys who cry like girls. Remember what I said up there at number one? Yeah, this is the same basic concept. Boys do not cry at the drop of a hat. You know what makes men cry, usually? Death. From time to time, birth, if they kid is theirs. I'm not saying there's not room for a few tears now and then. I'm saying that Harry Potter didn't cry when his godfather died, so chances are he's not going to burt into tears because Draco doesn't love him. So stop making him weep like a girl every chance you get. And as it turns out, I don't care that Draco crying is now canon or whatever. He's always been written like a little girl.

I leave it at four not because I don't have more, but because it's almost time for The Daily Show and I figure I've pissed enough people off. So let me just go ahead and say that the usual disclaimers do apply. All my opinion, you is a general term, and better people than I have done it all and done it well.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Boys talking about their feelings.

They do! I actually have male friends that do!!

Well, clearly they're really girls. ;)

I kid! I kid!

Thing is, I've got four brothers, and I've yet to see them honestly talk about jack shit that's got to do with an emotion without a fight. Though to be fair my family does fight a lot. It's how we burn calories. Anyway, so maybe it's just an environment thing, but really, I've not met a man or boy who is really into sitting down and telling you how they feel.

::hides from you::

xD It´s ok.

I also have a brother who won´t ever speak about his feelings, except for one or two moments when he actually did (he´s fifteen... I think... yeah, fifteen). It may be that the men I know are the exceptions of the rule, but the thing is I don´t think it´s a matter of being boy or girl, I think it has everything to do with the nature of the person. For example, you won´t ever hear me speaking about what I´m feeling, to no-one. Ever. And I´m a girl. My best male friend can´t be more clear about what his feelings are, and doesn´t have the slightest problem in saying them aloud.

Again, it´s the nature :P

You know, I'm not sure that I really draw a clear enough line between acceptable (to me!) use of boys talking. Because, well, Sirius, for one, I think is just exactly the type to stand at the bottom of the stairs in the middle of the night and scream his love with Remus to the world. But at the same time I would never buy he and Remus sitting down and having an actual conversation about what's real. I don't blink twice at Sirius blurting out that he loves Remus, especially in the middle of a fight, but "I'm afraid that loving you will damage our friendship, because I'm afraid you don't love me" or anything of the like, tends to make me cringe. Maybe it shouldn't be boys talking about their feelings so much as boys talking about their fears that get to me. I've yet to meet one who admits to shit like that. ;)

But yeah, a lot of it is nature, I agree with you there. Because while I'll accept Sirius at the bottom of the stairs in the middle of the night drunk off his arse and swearing his love for the world to hear, I'd never buy the same from Remus. Hell, you can do anything you please if you can make it work for the characters. ::shrugs::

makes it sound like there are four people there instead of two.

what? you mean like house/house/wilson/wilson? or maybe house/wilson/wilson/house? or house/wilson/house/wilson?

with thighholsters? *runs away*

TEASE!

::wails::

Lover. This word when used seriously? No.

I hate this. I mean, I actually *hate* it. And the thing is, that a lot of people do it, and a lot of them write really well. I'll be wandering along, really enjoying the story, and then suddenly it'll be like, "Sirius wanted more than anything to see his lover," and I'll just be thrown completely out of the story. Because I don't think many of the men I want to read fic about would ever think seriously using the word lover.

In fact, I like to think most of the people I really know would also never think that.

4. Boys who cry like girls.

*nods*

I've seen it done well, occasionally, but most people (myself included, I imagine) make them into girls the second they start crying. I don't mind the not really crying but close, and vigorously denying it besides. But even that is difficult to do well, and the situation has to be pretty special to warrant it. Mostly it should not be done. It should certainly not be done because couple x and y have a fight.

Er, opinionated much?

Er, opinionated much?

Oh, am I? I hadn't noticed. ;)

I'll admit to using pet names in fic. I mean, I've done it. But to be fair to, you know, me (which may or may not be the only kind of fairness I care about. You know, maybe.) mostly when I use pet names it's in jest. it's mocking or... whatever, as something just this side of an insult. At the same times, I had Draco affectionately call Harry a wanker once, so possibly I'm insane. However, HOWEVER. I've yet to find a male character that I think would even go near teh word lover. It irks me. Make it stop, please? ::begs::

And also: hee! I cannot stand it when it's the couple X and Y fight and cry and cry.

Then again, I like my fics stupidly emotional, like a fist around your throat, and there's no way to hold on to that with crying, really, because crying is a release. But I'm strange, and that's just one of the many reasons I am against it. :p

Oh, am I? I hadn't noticed.

Hey, I meant me. Although, please do not take this as a sign that I don't think you're opinionated. All the best people are, in my experience. *G*

I like pet names when they're used jokingly, especially when it's absolutely the kind of thing I think the character in question would do,but lover crosses a line I just can't cope with. Maybe we should start a fandom campaign against it. No lover will be safe from our rage! :D

I think sometimes the crying thing is also kind of easy, you know? It's like, 'Oh, let's make this story have an emotional impact. Tears will do that.' I like your idea better, of the emotion just being really tight, and that it *can't* be fixed by the shedding of some seriously womanly tears.

Well, opinionated people are certainly the only ones worth having a conversation with. :p

And oh, absolutely. "Fans Against Lover" Erm. Clearly we'll need a catchier slogan. "Lover, You're Going Under" Well, that one just sounds dirty. ::giggles:: I'm twelve. But yeah, I like pet names when they're used jokingly. Danny calling Rusty dear amuses me for reasons I can't pinpoint. ::shrugs::

I've never really been able to make tears work as an emotional impact. Hell, I've had characters throw up instead o cry, just because I suck at writing crying that much. And he had a good reason, you know, he was little and his mother had just killed herself. I didn't let him cry, but it worked out better that way, I think. A lot of times there is a thousand times more emotion in the moments where they're trying to not cry. Though I will now and forever call them "womanly tears" when they show up in my fic. :D

all across the alien nation

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