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let's be honest, I've never met a cliche I didn't like

Because there is no such thing as too much of a good thing, especially if you live in paradise:

The Hawaii Five-0 Cliche Meme

Fake boyfriends, accidental marriages, and amnesia, OH MY!

Whatever your poison, whatever you favorite cliche, it's open and allowed here. Want to see Steve and Danny make out for cover and discover their ~true feelings? What about when they have to pretend to be boyfriends to keep cover? When they're forced to share a bed all ~platonic-like for weeks and keep waking up cuddling and then can't sleep without each other? Maybe Grace playing matchmaker? The one where everyone but them realizes they're married? Danny gets de-aged to six and Steve has to take care of him? Steve gets magicked into a tiny, angry kitten and/or dragon? They one where they must cuddle for warmth to survive?

Maybe that isn't your flavor. Maybe you want the one where Kono is a punk rock princess that keeps getting into trouble? Or where Chin loses his memory and thinks he's back on the HPD force. Maybe the one where Kono is secretly a criminal mastermind, working the team from the inside. Or where she has the chance return to her pro surfing career and must choose. How about one where Chin goes on an epic road trip?

There is no bad cliche! Whatever your favorite, I promise I want to read/see it, too.

The Rules

♥ Every cliche welcome!
♥ All pairings, ratings, mediums, and genres can be included!
♥ Any word count works!
♥ Have fun and be kind. ♥♥♥

Comment and share the love! ♥

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I think the only thing I would add would be that Grace belatedly realizes that - oh noes - she neglected her flower girl duties, and flinging the entire contents of her basket at the newlyweds.

There are many wedding photos of Steve and Danny with petals stuck in their hair, and a few of Steve taking pity on Danny and trying to brush the petals off Danny's head (and Danny shooting murderous looks at his husband, because "You'd better not muss the 'do, Steven.")

And then there are the pictures from the reception, and even though Danny made Steve swear on his favorite Beretta that he wasn't going to do that ridiculous cake-in-the-face thing, it happens anyway, cake and icing and goopy strawberry filling everywhere, and Danny rolls his eyes when Steve laughs and pulls him in to smush their faces together. It's not about a kiss, it's about revenge, but if it ends with Steve licking icing from the tip of Danny's nose, well, there are photos of that, too.

(Ahahaha I completely understand Danny's reticence. Personally, I have a photo of myself at my wedding threatening my husband with the cake-knife)

Kono ensured that the reception would be OFF THE CHAIN, with wildly inappropriate "wedding" music but perfectly appropriate Steve-and-Danny music. And LOTS AND LOTS of booze: champagne, cocktails, beer, liquor.

(And Kono possibly hooks up with Mary but she will admit nothing)

Steve and Danny dance a lot and eat a lot of food and drink A LOT A LOT before retiring to their honeymoon suite with a bottle of champagne. And then they fall asleep, full and happy and maaaaybe a little ill.

(Seriously, it's not a real wedding unless the couple is too damn tired and gross-feeling to have sex hahahahahah)

Edited 2011-02-26 10:29 (UTC)

(And now Danny's had it twice, because you know there's no way he told Rachel not to do it. :D)

Danny wakes the next morning with the last strains of 'Sexy Eyes' repeating fuzzily in his head and swears he's going to get Steve to fire Kono for picking that as their wedding song, because great, that's just the tune he wants following him around for the rest of his life. He turns over and opens his mouth to tell Steve, but closes it and smiles instead. Steve's still asleep; his mouth is open the tiniest bit, and he's got his head pillowed on his arm, face turned towards Danny. The light spilling in the window, the light that had finally crept up across Danny's eyes and woken him, is turning Steve's skin gold, illuminating the lines of the tattoos on his arms. The sheet is gathered around his hips, revealing the top half of the design playing across his lower back, and Danny suddenly doesn't want to wake his husband. No, he wants to sit here and absorb him, to observe in detail the line of Steve's body, how muscle curves around bone, how sleep takes years from his face even if his hair is going a bit gray in places.

Danny watches him for a while, longer than he thought he'd ever want to just stare at anyone, until Steve's eyes crack open and he beams a sleepy smile at Danny.

"Morning," he says, reaching a sleep-warm hand out and wrapping it around the back of Danny's neck to draw him in for a kiss.

"Morning," Danny replies against his lips, feeling Steve's smile against his own.

Husband. That'll take a while to get used to. Danny hasn't been one of those in a long time, and he hasn't *had* one ever.

But he's an adaptable kind of guy. And he'll be especially adaptable just as soon as they've had breakfast; Danny's sisters paid a mint for this room, complete with pre-paid room service. Best wedding present ever.

When he married Rachel, Emily had given them stemware that Rachel had hated, Ginny had given them ugly bedsheets, and Lindsey had been too young to give them much of anything; this, he thinks with satisfaction, is his sisters giving yet another nod of approval to Steve, whether the other man knows it or not. This is his sisters being happy for him, not just doing a sisterly duty. This is them accepting Steve in a way that Rachel had had to work for; she'd earned it, eventually, but by the time she got there, things had already started going south between them. Steve, though, Steve is already a part of the family, and it makes something in his chest tighten to think about it.

Breakfast, he thinks to himself, breakfast in bed with his husband, and yeah, it's a little weird to think of it, but weird is something he associates with the man lying next to him, anyway.

Weird is the story of Danny's freaking life since he met Steve McGarrett, and weird is how things are going to be from now until eternity, but it's a good weird. A weird where Danny could not imagine living any other way.

What he has with Steve isn't the kind of relationship written about in novels, or cheesy romcom scripts. It's... unique. It's them. Steve McGarret and Danny Williams, and Steve-and-Danny (Danny's made his peace with almost always coming second in the bullshit portmanteau, out of necessity, and now he maybe - and he will not admit this under pain of death - relies on it. It feels familiar. Right. Being half of the whole is more than enough; he doesn't need to come first anymore to know where he stands)

So weird is normal, which is just a whole new level of weird, so Danny firmly hops off of that train of thought and turns his thoughts to food.

"Hungry?" he asks Steve, who's finally stretching his entire body, arching his back and twisting his shoulders.

Steve's smile is slow. "Seriously, we have this amazing hotel room, a mini-bar, a bathtub we could both swim in, and you want to eat?"

Danny smacks Steve's arm with the room service menu. "Breakfast is included, babe. And really, the mini-bar? You know it's like ten in the morning, right?"

Steve shrugs one shoulder as he props himself up. "Five o'clock somewhere."

Danny snorts. "Not anywhere near enough for you to be considering the mini-bar," he informs Steve, rolling out of bed and making his way to the bathroom in his worn pajama pants. He wanders back a few minutes later to find Steve just - staring at him. He glances back over his shoulder into the bathroom, and okay, his hair's a little ridiculous, but it's not like Steve has never seen him with bedhead before. "What?" he asks, a little self-consciously.

"You," Steve says with a little lopsided smile, "are gorgeous, you know that?"

Danny can feel the blush spreading across his face, because he knows he's not a bad-looking guy, not by a long shot, but gorgeous is probably pushing it. And, besides - "You're the looker here and we both know it," he replies with a smile and a shake of his head as he walks the rest of the way to the bed and sits.

"Nope," Steve disagrees, pulling Danny back into his body and kissing him again. "You're pretty much amazing, Danny."

"Could say the same about you," Danny murmurs against Steve's lips, and okay, maybe breakfast is overrated after all, because apparently having a husband makes you a huge sappy goof.

It's one of those things he's getting used to.

(It is so true that being married turns you into a sappy goof. I never, ever used to cry at wedding before, and now I cry if I see a fictional wedding on TV *flaily hands*)

And OK, maybe a *tiny tiny* voice in the back of Danny's mind is remembering how perfect his honeymoon with Rachel was, and how perfect their first three years of marriage were until he made detective and she started making noises about getting her life back because "I am not a housewife, Daniel."

Goddamnit.

This was so much easier the first time around, when Danny had no reason whatsoever to think he'd fail at being married. He wants to be "in the moment," he really does. And he is. But there's also a small voice that reminds him how much he stands to lose, and that it would kill him dead if this goes south.

It won't. It'd better not, because Grace and Kono and Chin will kill them both, if Danny's parents don't take him out first. They love Steve with unholy glee.

(And Danny's already pretty much already a sentimental goof, so being married, yep, he's a marshmallow. :D)

But there's another voice in his head that's starting to drown out that first voice, and it sounds suspiciously like Chin, which is something that Danny doesn't want to investigate too closely. Because yeah, it was great with Rachel until his work got to be too much - but Steve knows how much his work means to him. Steve knows where he stands in relation to the job and to Grace and to a hell of a lot of other things, knows how he fits into Danny's life. He understands the job-related stress, understands that wanting to help doesn't necessarily translate into being able to help, knows full well that sometimes talking is only going to make it worse. And for those days where talking makes it better, well, Steve's not going to recoil in horror at anything Danny's had to do, he's not going to balk at Danny's tone and language, he's not going to worry that it's pulling Danny in and in and in until he can't climb his way out. He gets it in a way that Rachel, God bless her, had tried to, but Rachel isn't a cop, and there are things he couldn't ask his wife to do for him.

Steve's not Rachel, Chin-voice - his voice of reason, and wow, would a shrink have a great time with him - says in the back of his head, calmly strangling that other voice so it can't be heard. Steve knows. History's not going to repeat itself, not here, not in the future, not with this man beside him.

They're going to make their own fuckups - it wouldn't be real and deep if they never, ever fucked up - but Danny knows in his gut that they won't be earth-shattering, world-ending fuckups. For all that Steve balks at talking about feelings, at putting himself out there and actually fucking telling Danny what he wants they have their own way of communicating.

They'd been able to read each other inside-out long before they started fucking, and time has only strengthened the weird mind-fusion. It's a little creepy sometimes, how much they're on the same wave length.

But Danny wouldn't change a thing.

Not a damn thing, except now he's actually hungry, so he reaches over and pokes Steve in the stomach until the other man turns and squints at him blearily. "Trying to take a post-orgasm nap here, Danno," he grumbles.

"Lunch," Danny contradicts, waving the menu at him again. "I'll order in, we'll eat, then we'll fill up the jacuzzi in the bathroom and find out what those jets can do."

Steve's eyes light up at the mention of the bathtub and Danny almost laughs at his predictability; mention water to the SEAL and it's like a kid with a shave ice. Yeah, so this is his life now, weird and insane and crazy, and it's not going to be easy, probably, but easy? Easy is boring.

OK, thiiiiis is officially The End

*heart eyes*

Oh BOYS!

Silly boys, they're so perfect for each other :D *smishes them* <3 <3

I had sooooo much fun writing this *friends*

Me too! :D *friends*

And I so loved reading this!

But (and this might sorta not really be a good but) you're awesomeness has distracted me from my bigbang of epic procrastination...oh well. a break with awesome fic is always good

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somehowunbroken - 2011-02-26 22:21 (UTC) - Expand

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teddibear.livejournal.com - 2011-11-20 16:02 (UTC) - Expand

I <3 y'all :D

Hee, glad you liked it :)

I love this part so much because it's really awesome to acknowledge that their relationship will have problems but it's not the end of the world - plus, I'm a HUGE sucker for emotional attachment before sex.

Thanks! I am so happy that my late-night ramblings made sense :D

This is too wonderful, I mean... Steve! Steve loves Danny so much! And Danny loves his Steve back and is a huge sappy goof! I have possibly melted in front of my computer and I love that so much.

ALSO: Steve-stretch. *dead*

Huge. Sappy. Goofs. :D

And yes, Steve-stretch, nghhh mental images.

Eeeee sleepy smiles!!!

(Also LOL at the song :D Silly Kono!)

They're so cute, aren't they? :D And Kono is silly and a little devious, mhmm :)

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