I do know what you mean. *raises hand, stomps feet and sings hallelujah* My first ever H/D fic absolutely makes me cringe, the initial chapters are so embarrassing. I think it gradually improves as the chapters pass, but god at first it's just so humiliatingly obvious that the author was fresh off the fanfic boat. I feel like pulling it sometimes but i can't, it was actually quite popular despite being sorta pathetic. However, some of my recent stuff makes me feel quite proud of myself, if only for the fact that i CAN compare them to first ficcie and see a marked improvement.